Saturday, February 5, 2011

The Power of Negative Thinking

We all have days where we just can't get along with people.  Whether they be creationists, Trekkies, gym teachers, or CEOs of Apple Inc., there always seems to be someone around to bug the everloving shit out of you.  But there are a few things you can tell yourself each day to relieve yourself the weariness of listening to these individuals.  Tell yourself: "Today, I choose to think bigger than that.  Today, I choose to be a fatalist."

Fatalism and even abject nihilism can help you through each day by putting things into perspective.  For example:

-Your boss chews you out for doing what he himself told you to do.  Don't get mad, just put things into perspective!  Your boss will most certainly die one day.  The chances of him slowly wasting away, alone and friendless, are not bad.  Why even fantasize about revenge when reality has already agreed to do the job?

-Idiots control the government, and schools are forced to teach your children ludicrous idiocy by religious nut jobs.  But remember, there is hope.  Things can't be bad forever.  Someday western society will collapse, and the very boobs who once used their incessant shouting to get the country to do what they wanted will then have to eat each other.  Gone will be the politics of idiots.

-Human beings insist on being greedy, shallow, credulous, and violent.  But remember, even for the whole human race there is hope.  Extinctions of large land animals are all but inevitable, and humanity is even doing us the favor of ensuring the world will be a hostile place for them to live in a century or less!  Even if humanity does somehow survive its own stupidity, the sun will eventually go out.  And the universe will eventually succumb to entropy, and there won't be enough available energy to support life anywhere!  Sick of humans?  Once again, nature saves the day with the beautiful promise of unavoidable doom.

So today, ask yourself:
Do I look at the big picture?
How much does this really matter in the grand scale?
And most importantly, am I negative enough?

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